"So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” Matt. 19:6, ESV
Are You a "Giver?" Is your Spouse a "Giver?". Something to think about? The answer may be the reason you have had much difficulty in your marriage. The above scripture says, "They are n longer two but one flesh." So, if you are a giver but your spouse is not there is already division. I am not talking about financial giving at this moment, but that is also important, no, I am talking about having a selfless heart towards the person you love!
Marriage, a sacred covenant relationship that we all enter in knowing exactly what we are doing at times, but, after the I do and the honeymoon period (that ends quickly) we begin to question, "who is this ##!?&#@# I married?" When you don't get what you want, or you have unmet expectations.
It has been my experience that when you enter marriage without discussing with your soon to be spouse your view or perception of what marriage is, from both of your perspectives, you are entering into a covenant with a dirt foundation that will waste away with the storms, test and trials.
It is important that you have the same mind and heart entering into any covenant relationship, Marriage most importantly or there will be more war than peace!
Don't let your Marriage become a chore or a death sentence when you become one of those that feel your untitled to better treatment than your spouse because you go into it with an incorrect perspective.
"My wife is going to Waite on me hand and foot, I don't have to do nothing but work and pay the bills!"
"My husband treats me like a queen, I don't have to cook, clean or do anything but look good and he does everything else."
"You knew I couldn't cook when you married me!". Just to name a few, and this is why the end abruptly in divorce.
Marriage is not about self-serving attitudes, nor is it a game of you give and I'll take! No, marriage is about both partners in this covenant giving and being givers to each other!
God has given us principles to live, love and give by that should be reciprocal, especially in marriage.
“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets." Matt. 7:12
"Give, and it will be given to you. They will pour into your lap a good measure—pressed down, shaken together, and running over [with no space left for more].For with the standard of measurement you use [when you do good to others], it will be measured to you in return.” Luke 6:38
"Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.". 2 Corinthians 9:7 KJV
"But this I say, He which soweth sparingly shall reap also sparingly; and he which soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully.". 2 Corinthians 9:6 KJV
"I have shewed you all things, how that so labouring ye ought to support the weak, and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive."
Acts 20:35 KJV
Acts 20:35 KJV
There are so many more scriptures and principles that I could share but I think you get the message. If you have the correct heart, there is nothing that you would not give or do to show your spouse that love, even when they don't. It's not about doing to get, it's about doing just because the Bible says, " A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth good". Luke 6:45
So next time you are getting ready to complain about what your spouse didn't do for you, check and see that you have the right heart of giving. When we have two people with the right hearts, one always strives to out do the other because their desire is to be a blessing to their spouse always!
Be a giver, and give! Time, love , respect, compassion, special things, etc. Not to expect anything in return, and watch the impact of your giving in your marriage transform you and your spouse to Mr. & Mrs. Givers!
